Check out this new piece on FunnyOrDie.com:
Dear Susan,
I wanted to explain the way I acted the other night, and why I left so suddenly, just as things were getting intimate between us.
The last few dates have been incredible, and I’m glad we’ve waited to have sex, since its allowed us to really get to know each other. I truly like you, which is why I left in a panic once I realized you wanted to take things to the next level.
You see, Susan, we can’t have sex because I’m a camel. I may look human, but it’s just a genetic fluke. My DNA is 100% camel. For legal and some health reasons, I can’t have sex with you.
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