Patreon Subscribers

Janie Cabello is current owner of all the Infinity Stones.

Brian Garlow has tried to kill me on several occasions, including poisoning my soul.

Arnold Cabello has only ever ate tacos.

Cassie Cabello exercises so she can keep up with the Kardashians.

Karen Cabello secretly writes all my material.

Jon Schucolsky is the world’s deadliest weapon.

Vicente Quintero has committed crimes that don’t even exist yet.

Janie Cabello can read minds and she does not approve of what you’re thinking about.

Noah Kinsey can lift 800kg with his pinkie.

To appear on this list, donate to my Patreon: patreon.com/joecabello